yo, chesterburgh — serious vibes incoming. what started as your usual late-night scroll through the town’s public wifi hotspot turned into an absolute wild ride that even made me question if the rona mutated or if Big Brother’s just flexing hard. if you’ve been near the Chesterburgh Library parking lot in the past week, you might’ve caught some strange vibes (or should i say signals 👀).

ok, here’s the tea. last thursday around midnight, a bunch of local gamers and wifi hunters started noticing a super sus new network popping up on their phones & laptops — something literally called “theyseeus_420”. naturally, you’d assume it’s a prank, a weird IT glitch, or maybe a local high schooler memeing, right? but nah, this turned into a whole night of checking and tracking every suspicious wifi name popping around town. and it got creepy fast.

over several nights, a pattern emerged. not only was “theyseeus_420” showing up near the library parking lot, but other equally bizarre ssids started popping across Chesterburgh: “listentocalling”, “stayonthelinepls”, “underwatcher”, and my personal favorite for night terrors, “imjustnodes”. not exactly the names you wanna connect to, ngl. every single one of these appear in a 1-mile radius, and only after 11 pm.

this wouldn't be too crazy if these networks were just a weird coincidence or a local wifi fandom (i’m looking at you, Chesterburgh meme page admins), but the thing is — these strange wifi signals aren’t just random broadcasts. some tech-savvy users using Wi-Fi analyzing apps found that these are actually mesh network nodes. that means multiple devices are linking up to create a hidden, secret wifi web all over our town. and guess who’s not vibing with this? the cops won’t confirm anything, and the town council is “looking into it” but haven’t dropped any actual deets yet. theory time? could be surveillance. or worse: some mega geek hacker gang.

to get eyes on the ground, i went to the library parking lot myself. dark, kinda creepy, security cameras exist but they looked super old (like when dial-up was still a thing), and the wifi was definitely stronger than it should be. also, a local midnight jogger told me about seeing “strange unmanned cars parked near the wifi hotspots, keeping lights off and windows tinted.” she asked to stay anon cuz, yeah, that’s scary.

i hit up the Chesterburgh PD on this — here’s the short: they claim no one officially set up any secret network, and if someone did, it’s rogue. they say “it’s probably just pranksters,” but when i pressed about the unmanned cars and why they're radio silent about it? radio silence. pretty sus.

now, the town council just put out a weird statement yesterday that “all wifi activity is consistent with normal community usage” and something about “no evidence of unauthorized digital infrastructure.” when you squeeze that through meme-speak it basically means “we don’t want to talk about it.” meanwhile, local tech nerds are like “bro, this mesh network is no normal thing.” and honestly, if Chesterburgh turns into some surveillance state or secret hacker hangout, i’m gonna be shook.

oh and btw, for all the conspiracy lovers out there, some folks in the “chesterburgh gamers” discord noticed that the new wifi networks appear right after the town council livestream ends, which also happens to glitch out at the exact same time. coincidence? or someone digitally lurking on those unmuted mics when the council forgets to press mute? we deserve answers.

quick poll: is this weird or government weird? cuz i’m leaning hard on the latter. meanwhile, i’ll be camping near the library parking lot to